The oiled-up naked runner

Family guy has the greased-up deaf guy, in Dallas we have the oiled-up naked runner.

This morning I saw this runner: shirtless, wearing only a very minimal shorts (actually, my underwear is bigger than his shorts) and running-sleeve, all oiled-up with I-don't-know-what kind of grease or oil or whatever. It was glittering in the morning light.

He skipped the "being funny" and the "being ridiculous" steps and he went straight to the top shelf: he was gross (also his stride was gross: popping his but left and right like a naked ostrich).

Seriously dude, I really don't care how you like to run, but at that hours in the morning there are other runners, family going to work and kids waiting for the school bus. You should consider these variables in the equation "how much naked I'm going to run this morning"...

Do you want to feel free during your run? Go to run in a forest or go to run at 5 o'clock in the morning: beside me, no one else is out and, as I told you already, I don't care.